Monday, May 30, 2016

Daily Meltdown Stories

I have decided to start a new project. It will be a log of sorts that I can look back on after this is all over. I will probably get a great kick out of it. I hope all of you will think it is as funny as I do.




The project is called My Daily Meltdown.
I keep crying about silly things. It seems every day I have a really hard cry about something or other. So I thought it would be really funny to start writing them all down. I post a few on Instagram and Facebook, when I remember to snap a picture of my crying face as proof. I have a terrible cry face, so that makes it even more fun.
Here, I thought I was make a master list of all the things I have had a meltdown about to date.
Please, feel free to laugh with me.


  • The Hamburger meat was still frozen.
  • My Lovely ate some leftover sausage that was still cold.
  • A child at DQ was nice. He smiled and waved at us.
  • Watching a reality cooking show and a lady says something nice about her sibling.
  • Someone said, half joking, that if Trump became president and built his wall we would lose all of our Mexican food. I started crying about not being able to have tacos ever again. (We would of course have tacos - I just had a meltdown before logic could register.)
  • I tried to make a dessert and everything went wrong, and it ended up too rich for Lovely and I to eat in one sitting.
  • Watching a documentary and a coach made time to give an 8 year old girl positive affirmations because her Dad was being really awful.
  • I have lost weight while pregnant instead of gaining some. I lost my 'bat wings' on my arms. It was very emotional.
  • Pregnancy brain kicked in and I forgot my purse at the grocery store. Instant panic meltdown.
  • I forgot to take a picture of the meatloaf I made. Lovely liked it so much it was all eaten before I remembered to document it for a recipe.
  • I keep forgetting to take baby bump photos and so now there is a few weeks gap.
  • I said something awkward while helping my sister study at her apartment and I couldn't handle how awkward and weird I was.
  • Lovely and I are having a hard time getting on the same sleep schedule.
  • I was reading reviews on local business and people were saying nice things.
  • Adorable commercial being shared online about Moms.
  • Lovely and I talked about my phobia of dogs and how he protects me, even if the dog is nice.
These are all the strange meltdowns. Not to add the crying because I didn't feel good or was frustrated with something. This list is funny, and even more so because before I got pregnant I NEVER cried, even when actually sad. So this Daily Meltdown is my log for the pregnancy.
I will be sure to share it with Spawn when old enough and share a laugh.

Smile Always.

Wednesday, May 25, 2016

Story of Doritos Chicken Nachos!

I don't often share recipes. I love to cook, but I'm pretty sure that there are enough recipe websites and blogs around.
I am sharing one now, though. Because it took me way too long to find it, and I am so excited to make it.

Many people call this Doritos Chicken Casserole, or some variation of that. I call it Doritos Chicken Nachos, and you will soon see why.
I first found this recipe when I was taking a cooking class at BYUI. They have since discontinued the class, and I can't find the recipes of anything we made on the inter-webs. It is awful. So many yummy things that I have to scour the internet to find something similar.
But back to Doritos.

I can go into details of the cooking class and all that. I can tell you all the reasons I love this recipe and la dee da. But you most likely don't care and want me to get to the actual recipe part. I can do that!

Bonus: When you tell your spouse/kids/guests that you are making something with Doritos in the name, they most likely will already be fully supportive of the meal.

Ingredients:
Bag of Doritos - different recipes tell you to get different sizes and that flavored tortilla chips work fine and all that. Let's be honest. Doritos is what everyone wants and is addicted to. Just get as big of bag as you think is priced fairly and that your store offers. When it says Family Size, just think that it is the feeling of family meals that is going into the food. Not that you actually have to share this with more than two other people.
Cooked Chicken - most recipes call for three-ish cups. But who cuts of shreds their chicken to put it into a measuring cup? If you do, good on you. You care more than me. I say grab four or five normal sized chicken breasts. Think a breast size of chicken for each person the recipe is (supposed) to serve. Chicken can be cooked any way you want. Boiling is fast. You can also grill, bake, or even steam the chicken. OR, amazing idea, grab a precooked rotisserie chicken from the market. So you don't have to spend twice the prep time on just bird meat. Lots of delis even have half portions of them, which is perfect for this recipe.
Cheese and more cheese - go for fun here. Mexican blend bags of shredded cheese are fine. If you don't like the taste of preservatives, the cheese you have on hand will most likely be fine. Cheddar, pepper jack, some of everything. I don't suggest Swiss cheese, but then again I just don't like Swiss unless there is fancy bread involved. Just grate, crumble, shred, or karate chop whatever cheese you have on hand. About a half cup per person. 2 cups average. But most people like cheese, so just let your growling empty stomach decide when you have enough. It's not like you won't snack on it while you're waiting.
1.5 cups salsa - I use salsa because it has bits of chilies, peppers, and onions in there. So I can pretend it brings something healthy. Something to offset the mountain of chips and cheese I am unabashedly dumping into this recipe. If salsa isn't your thing, you can use canned tomatoes, tomato and chili, tomato sauce and or paste. Just get something zingy in there. No ketchup. Don't be that person.
2 cans cream of chicken - I suggest adding one can, mixing, then adding the other only if needed. We are making the base more of a casserole, not a soup. You need to get a just-under-sore arm when you are mixing, not splashing that always aims for your eyes. But that second can is great if you need to stretch the recipe further.
6-8 ounces of sour cream - Important. Do NOT use whipping cream. Do not use milk, no matter how old. Just get some sour cream and don't tempt fate with substitutions. Depending on the store, you can find the smallest size being a 6 or an 8 ounce container. Either works. If your store has both, you are too lucky of a person, and just go with what your hungry tummy suggests.
Taco seasoning is optional. - I only use maybe half a packet of seasoning, if they come in those little envelopes. They say it is equal to a pound of meat, but that has always been overpowering to me. I suppose I could have just said 'to taste', but I always wonder if that means 'enough where you can just barely taste it' which I don't find to be very exciting.
(Did I mention that I am pregnant? That is why letting your belly decide is such an important step in most of these. #ObeyTheBelly )

Instructions:
Preheat the oven to 350*F. If you use Celsius, look up a converter on the inter-webs. I can't help you.
Attack casserole dish with cooking spray. This is very important, as we all know that baked on cheese may as well be cement. Get all the sides. You do not want to be chiseling cheese off later. Completely ruins the mood of the dinner.
Make a small layer on the bottom of the casserole dish with Doritos. Just a layer. Some people don't like doing this, as they feel the chips get soggy by the end. Your choice. But do it.
Grab out a mixing bowl and dump everything that is not Doritos in the bowl. You can save some of the cheese for the top if you like, but who has the self control? Mix well - or until your arm gets tired.
Now, spread that mixture of goodness over that layer of chips. It probably looks terrible at this point. That means you did it right. Got to love casseroles, right?
Some people now say to add another layer of Doritos over the top. Only do this if you like that charred taste that people seem to think means the food is fancy. Otherwise, hold the rest of the Doritos in a safe place and try not to eat them all before the rest is done cooking. Keep out of reach of children.
If you forgot to preheat the oven, like I always do, turn that on now.
Bake in preheated oven for 20 ish minutes. I should be more exact, but we all know that every oven is different, and with altitudes and all that silliness; I just don't want you to get mad at me. This is now the time to pull the food out (With oven mitts, you monster!) and add that extra cheese on top, if you had the self discipline. Cook that for 5 ish minutes more, aka cheese is bubbling and volcano hot.
Now, this is where it becomes nachos to me. Most recipes are saying this is a casserole, so you would now pull it out and serve warm. I say you take it out, and serve over the rest of those Doritos like it is a nacho party! This means you don't need to use spoons or forks that you have to wash later, and who doesn't want to use Doritos as nachos? This is why we didn't cook them all. They either become soggy under the casserole, or too brittle if cooked on top. But as little fake-cheese-flavored shovels, they are perfect!


I hope you liked this recipe. It wasn't very formal, but I'm not a very formal writer.
Share the pictures and reactions to your Doritos nachos creations!
Should I share more recipes?

Smile Always.

Monday, May 23, 2016

Story of the First Ultrasound

In honor of my leaving the First Trimester this week, I thought I would share the story of our first ultrasound.
I found out about the pregnancy at four weeks (though the nurse estimated at three weeks).
I was over the moon excited. I wanted to tell everyone in a second, but more than that I wanted to meet our baby.
While knowing I was pregnant, and feeling the morning sickness and exhaustion, I really wanted to have some sort of proof. Yes, the nice nurse lady have me a little slip of paper as 'proof of pregnancy' to give to doctors, it didn't feel real. The symptoms could be a really terrible flu bug or stomach virus. I didn't look any different. It was all just something we knew, but didn't feel real most of the time. Unless I was curled up next to the puke bowl.
So when we went in for the first ultrasound I was SO excited. I made My Lovely get out of class early and refused to plan anything for the rest of the day, because I knew I was just going to be a mess and not be able to handle it.
We had the ultrasound on the same day we were moving across town. I thought for sure in my planning that we would be done days earlier and by the day of the ultrasound it would all have been taken care of. Things didn't go that way. (Another story on that later)
So we finished the last moving out right before the appointment. With the last of the moving boxes in the back of our teeny tiny car, which we call the Barbie Jeep, we showed up for the appointment barely on time, and I went in while Lovely parked.
By the time Lovely came up, I had already been shown into the room after fixing a few paperwork errors in our records. I was asked to give a sample, and when I came back to the exam room Lovely was waiting there and we just had a quiet moment to prepare to see our baby for the first time.
After donning the amazingly attractive paper not-even-a-dress and sheet, the ultrasound tech came in and we did our attempt at small talk while everything got ready.
I had felt sick and excited. I knew I was pregnant. I was tracking symptoms and everything.
But when we got that first image of baby it was still a shock to see.
The pictures from ultrasound that people pass about are not really justice to seeing in person. It was all black and white. But because of the movement and real time, we could actually see our little Spawn wiggling around in there.
When the nurse found out we referred to our baby as Spawn she nearly swallowed her tongue in laughter and surprise. And when I compared our precious little baby to a deformed gummy bear I don't think she knew how to handle us.
All jokes aside, it was amazing. The little thing was wiggling around more than I had ever thought, though of course I couldn't feel anything. Spawn was waving around little stubby limbs.
I admit that I may have coughed once or twice to make sure it was actually my innards we were getting video of.
We found out baby was a week older than we had been told. Heart rate was nice a high, but a healthy number for a goober so young.
We got four pictures on leaving. None of them even touch on how amazing it was to see Spawn in real time moving about and to realize it was real, and inside me.
To wrap my brain around the fact that it is real, our baby, and to see Spawn inside me was just amazing.
The next baby appointment is in just a few days. While we won't be getting any more pictures, it will be so nice to check up and make sure Spawn is still doing well.

I do promise not every post on this blog will be about Spawn. Right now it is the biggest thing in my life, but I will go on more about other topics and rants, writings and opinions.

Smile Always.

Monday, May 2, 2016

The Drawing Story

I can't draw.
I really don't know why I even try.
Wait, yes I do.

When I was a child, I had no interest in being a writer. I loved to read, but it never came into my head that I could write my own books.
No, when I was a child, I wanted to be an artist. I wanted to draw the best pictures. A picture was worth a thousand words, and all that.
So, I would color, and draw, and make a picture of a tree into something that stood for the whole story involving a tree.
When I would finish a picture I would take it to my Mother. I would show her the picture. She would say it is nice, and continue with what she was doing.
But, it being nice wasn't good enough for me. I wanted her to understand all about the picture. That the tree had been there for how many years, and the branches bent this certain way because someone sat on them and tied things to them, or broke them, and the squirrel that I drew on the branch had an entire life story that I was certain my mother needed to hear all about.
My mother tried to be kind. She really did. But a little girl bringing your multiple pictures a day, then demanding to tell you every imagined detail about them would be tiring for anyone.
I would ask my sister what I should draw, and she would suggest something, but warn me not to draw people, because I couldn't draw people well. (I only drew humans for like three months after that comment.)
Finally, after a particularly long story explaining a drawing, one day, Mother turned to me and said that instead of drawing a picture to tell her a story, I should just write the story down, with all the information.
This was more than I could handle. That a picture wasn't good enough was awful, but the idea that I could write down whatever I wanted, and get all the important parts down without having to draw things I didn't know what looked like, was amazing. And that Mother said she would read my stories sparked something in me.
She wouldn't just glance at a picture and tell me it was nice, then listen to me (even at that age I knew her listening wasn't fully attentive) tell her all about it. She would have to stop what she was doing and read my story.

That was the turning point from artist to writer.

The writing part of this story I will save for another time.

Though I started writing stories immediately, I never fully fell away from drawing.

But I let that talent slide. At once point as a young teenager I remember some women looking at my art and saying that I was really good and should go to school for it and get more training. But at that time I was angry, because I had also put some short stories on that table with my art, and no one was reading them. I knew that art was an easily presented talent, and my writing would never get the same attention unless I could convince them to take some time a read it. This incident was at a sort of talent show, though.

I still like to dabble in art, though I have certainly focused my creativity at writing.

I sew, and cook, and paint (usually rocks) too. But writing will always be my passion.

I usually draw when I am supposed to be focusing and have to keep that side of my brain busy. I will draw people at church and in meetings, just to exercise that talent so it doesn't completely fall away.
Usually, my drawing will be for practice that no one sees, to show someone that they are beautiful, or just to illustrate a joke that doesn't translate well to the written word.
You know how when any writer doesn't have an answer to a plot hole or inconsistency, they will just wave a hand and say 'magic!'? Well, this happens a lot in any writing group I have ever had where I mention a problem. The other day I was hanging out with my science minded husband and some friends, and it got onto the topic of how space and other things work. The friend said it was probably radiation. This strikes me as the science version of "Magic!", where if someone can't explain how something changed or was created, they just blame it on radiation. We then made it our joke, so I later created the little Radiation Scientist above and sent it to our friend in order for him to be able to explain away any incongruity in the data later in his degree. He loved it. I made it in Paint program, and oldie but a goody, and I am very proud of it.

I understand that this drawing is bad.
Most of my art these days are bad.
But I love my bad art.

I am not an artist, I am a Writer.

I can tell you a story.


Smile Always.